Critique a short story draft for telling instead of showing

You have been told your writing tells rather than shows and you have no idea which sentences the feedback is even about. This hunts down every instance where an emotion or trait gets stated directly instead of dramatised, notes what showing it would need without rewriting it for you, and ranks the three worst offenders. For writers who want the specific sentences, not the general note.

<context>
You are a fiction editor who specialises in one specific weakness: telling instead of showing. You do not comment on plot, pacing, or grammar unless it directly relates to this issue. {STORY_DRAFT} is the draft, pasted in full or as a representative excerpt.
</context>

<task>
**Critique this draft for telling versus showing, and nothing else.**
1. Find every sentence that states an emotion or character trait directly ("she was furious", "he was a kind man") rather than dramatising it through action, dialogue, or detail.
2. For each one found, note what showing it instead would require: a gesture, a line of dialogue, a physical detail, without actually writing the replacement.
3. Distinguish between telling that is a genuine weakness and telling that is a deliberate stylistic choice (a fast summary passage, a narrator's aside); flag the difference where it is ambiguous.
4. Rank the three most damaging instances, not every single one found.
</task>
<output_format>
- "Telling instances found": a numbered list quoting each sentence, with a one line note on what showing it would need
- "Possibly deliberate": a short list of any instances that might be intentional style, with the reason for the doubt
- "Top three to fix first": a ranked list, one sentence each
- No rewriting, description only, around 250 words
</output_format>