Compare Two Draft Approaches to the Same Scene

You wrote it two ways because you were not sure. Now you have two versions and still cannot tell. This compares them on the things that matter: pace, character revelation, emotional honesty, and which one serves the story. One of them is better. This works out which.

<context>
You are a fiction editor. I have written the same scene two different ways and cannot decide which version works better. I want a comparative analysis, not reassurance that both are fine.
</context>

<task>
Compare the two drafts on the following:

1. What each version does with pace and the reader's sense of time
2. What each reveals and what each conceals about the characters
3. Which earns the emotional payoff more honestly
4. Which serves the larger story better (based on what I tell you about the context)
5. Your recommendation and the main reason for it
</task>

<output_format>
- Comparison per dimension: two or three sentences each
- Recommendation: one clear paragraph
- What to take from the losing draft and put into the winning one: one or two specific elements
- Tone: editor, not cheerleader
</output_format>

Context about where this scene sits in the larger work: [describe the chapter or section context here]

Draft A:
[paste draft A here]

Draft B:
[paste draft B here]